Inauguration predictions

by on December 27, 2008  •  In Uncategorized

I hereby make the following predictions for the inauguration ceremony:

  • Rev. Rick will be mushy lovey blah blah blah.
  • The Rickster will use the words "life" and "equal;" possibly the phrase "all God's children;" but not the word "marriage." (I get triple points if he says, "All God's children are equal – we share the gift of life.")
  • Jeremiah Wright will be in the audience, listening to the Rickster up there on stage, looking really, really pissed. He will try to speak to the press afterward, but no one will recognize him.
  • The word "gay" will be used for the first time in history at an inauguration, possibly by Rev. Lowry.
  • The rock star of the event will be the poet Elizabeth Alexander.
  • Her poem will not rhyme.
  • Use of the word "historic" by media commentators will reach historic, indeed stratospheric levels.
  • Joe Biden will not be permitted to speak to the press.
  • The happiest man on the stage will be George Bush.
  • We will all still feel like dancing afterwards.


One Response to Inauguration predictions

  1. Darren Hutchinson December 28, 2008 at 11:18 AM

    I’m waiting on what Aretha performs! I think she should do “Some Day We Will All Be Free,” but I am not sure that it will pan out. So I won’t make a prediction.

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